Two deeply religious Irish retirees were sitting on a patio playing checkers and sipping fine Irish whiskey. They enjoyed the

mid-day sun almost as much as much as watching the localcitizens walk by.

A few minutes go by and a middle-aged women pushes a baby stroller past the patio.

The first Irishman looks to the other and says, "You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

"Aye," says the other as he takes a pull from his whiskey. "Shamus, I surely am. A fine day for a stroll with a wee one."

"Aye," agrees the first Irishman and they go about their game of checkers.

A few minutes later, a young couple stroll down the avenue hand in hand, gazing deeply into each others eyes.

The first Irishman looks to the other and says, "You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

"Aye," says the other as he takes another pull from his whiskey. "Shamus, I surely am. A fine day for a stroll with a lover."

"Aye," agrees the first Irishman and they do about their game of checkers.

A few more minutes later, a young lass wearing clothes scarcely covering her shapely curves stops in front of the patio, bends over in front of the Irishmen giving them full exposure to her lovely rear, and smells the flowers in a near flower bed and walks on.

The first Irishman looks to the other and says, "You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

"I'm not rightly sure this time, Shamus," says the other as he takes yet another pull from his whiskey. "But if I am, I'll surely be joinin' you in confession this afternoon"

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Wrong Side

A young priest gets up in the morning and goes to breakfast. On his way there two nuns look at him and he says, "Good

morning sisters" and they reply in a sing song manner, "You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

This stuns the priest who thought he had been very polite but he just goes on. He encounters a Brother a little while later along the way and he says,"Good morning Brother." The Brother replies in a sing song voice, "You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

The priest looks confused at all this but goes on.

He gets a little farther and he comes across a fellow priest and he says, "Good morning Father." the priest replies in a sing song manner, "You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

Now the priest was mad. He continues his walk to the dinning hall not saying a word to anyone. The Bishop sees him and says, "Father ..."

The young priest was not going to take any more even from the bishop. He looks at the bishop and says, "No I did not get up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

The bishop looks at him stunned and says "What?"

The priest realized his mistake and said "I am sorry your holiness, what is it you want."

The bishop looks at him and says, "All I was going to do was ask you why you had on Sister Ann's shoes?"

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Weary

There was a large revival meeting on the outskirts of town, and at the appropriate corner there was a large sign proclaiming....

"If you are weary of sin and want to be saved, turn here, go 100 yards, and come into the revival tent."

Below the sign someone had hung another smaller one....